The Nameless Aha's Debt Statement
Last updated 2026-05-05
The Nameless Aha's Debt Statement is a readable found on Planarcadia.
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Solely for the sake of fun, I have, on numerous occasions during my voyage aboard the Astral Express, misappropriated and vandalized public property of the Express, thereby incurring financial losses to the Express and liability for third-party damages. Having received the Conductor's earnest instruction, I have come to a profound realization of my transgressions. I hereby itemize all outstanding reparations below, to be settled at a future date.
The itemized list of reparations due from "Aha" is as follows:
Tele-Microwave Oven (Qty: 1 unit)
Supersonic Slippers (Qty: 2 pairs)
Optical Camouflage Cloak (Qty: 1)
Anti-Gravity Levitation Carpet (Qty: 1)
Haider Brooms bearing a striking resemblance to swords (Qty: 2). Note: Liability for this entry is jointly assumed with Akivili
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Leviathan Tooth (Qty: 2)
Trimmed Conductor's Outfit (Qty: 1)
Organ Dragonflies deposited by the Mourning Actors (Qty: 2)
Medical expenses incurred due to allergic reactions from the introduction of electronic mustard into the rice cooker
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Graffiti removal fees for the statue complex of White Rolling Stone Planet
Repair costs for walls in the Museum of Animated Arts, and recovery expenses for escaped collection items (3 portraits and 7 specimens remain unaccounted for to date)
Incident during extravehicular angling: An erratic Comet Fish caused a collision resulting in damages to 3.1415926 solar sails on Planet Goldberg (Note: Liability for this entry is jointly assumed with Akivili)
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Satellite Unit from the Centurial Stellar Ring (Qty: 0.5)
Six-Eyed Yaks of the Duchy of Huronte (Qty: 9)
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1 Anti-Beast-Horde Naval Cannon sourced from the Old Luntinium Exhibition Hall and 1 artificial satellite (neutralized via accidental discharge)
Several pillows lost to the atmosphere of Planet Slyee during a pillow fight, inclusive of Conductor Pom-Pom's favorite bolster.
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Fines levied by the Cosmic Paleontological Conservation Association regarding gastric ulcers in a void song whale, induced by an unauthorized expedition within the creature's stomach
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Xenohydros released from the custody of the Architects (Qty: 3)
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Roaring Golden Pothos (Qty: 1)
Accrued multiple outstanding tabs at "World's End" in the capacity of a Nameless
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A shockingly lengthy entry, extensive enough to reach the ground
Crispy Crumbly Pom-Pom Pie ×22 (of which, 3 were utilized as fishing bait, 9 dispensed as yak fodder, 10 deployed as projectiles against space pirates during a skirmish. Please accept my sincere apologies for the misappropriation of the conductor's labor-intensive provisions)
Half an Astral Express
Other Languages
| Language | Official Name |
|---|---|
| English | The Nameless Aha's Debt Statement |
| Chinese (Simplified) | 无名客「阿哈」的债务清单 |
| Chinese (Traditional) | 無名客「阿哈」的債務清單 |
| Japanese | ナナシビト「アッハ」の賠償対象物一覧 |
| Korean | 무명객 「아하」의 채무 리스트 |
| Spanish | Lista de deudas del Anónimo Aha |
| French | Liste des dettes du Sans Nom Aha |
| Russian | Список долгов Безымянного Ахи |
| Thai | รายการหนี้สิน: ผู้มาเยือนนิรนาม "Aha" |
| Vietnamese | Danh Sách Nợ Của Khách Vô Danh "Aha" |
| German | Die Schuldenliste des namenlosen Aha |
| Indonesian | Daftar Utang The Nameless "Aha" |
| Portuguese | Declaração de Dívidas da Divindade Inominada Aha |